Episode 78: Straight Up Ignoring People

    When I was in high school, especially my junior and senior years, I was desperate for the cool kids to like me. I was constantly looking for ways to talk to them, and trying to be cooler when they were physically near me. 

    Part of this venture included me sending a bunch of Facebook friend requests to these people. Sometimes, these friend requests were deleted, by people who I knew knew me. That caused a sense of alienation, a sense of knowing these people that knew me thought I wasn't good enough to associate with, even as a mere connection on a social media platform. It made me feel lesser than; the rejection from the cool kids meant I was one of the lame kids.  

    What hurt, even perhaps worse than the rejected friend requests, was the ignored messages. To this day, if someone "ghosts" me, I just feel gross. Ignoring me means you think I'm not worth your time, which means I'm not good enough. Back to feeling alienated again.

     Let's be clear: ignoring people is okay sometimes. If someone's harassing you, being creepy, or trying to provoke you, ignoring them is okay. In fact, responding to someone negatively might just egg them on and encourage them to keep acting up. In fact, you're never required to respond to someone - but the absence of a response might be making someone feel bad.

     Ignoring people goes way above just conversational stuff too. In entertainment, for example. So many studios and companies ignore input from fans and critics and pump out content that is less than stellar when, if they would just listen, they would be making stuff people like and appreciate.

    But think about the government too. It's a widespread notion nowadays that politicians are liars and will tell you whatever they can to get themselves into office, or keep themselves in office. Don't get it twisted: I'm not saying all politicians are bad. I think some of them genuinely do care and listen and at least try to deliver on their promises. However, it is really bad for a politician to be someone who straight up ignores people. As a government official, you are required to look out for the good of the people. Meaning you have to listen to them. Listen when they say what they want to have happen and help make it happen. Listen to what's harming them, what can be fixed and improved, and do what is in your power to do.

     In conclusion, ignoring people is a tricky thing. Sometimes it's right, but a lot of times it's wrong. Make sure withholding your attention from someone isn't done out of arrogance or indifference.